Live life, even when times are rough
It has definitely been a year filled with unfortunate circumstances, however, whatever challenges I have faced, I have overcome. There have been days where I have felt overwhelmed, physically and mentally exhausted, to the point I have just wanted to curl under the duvet and pretend I don't exist. However, what has kept me going is the share hope that things will get better. I have too much to look forward to and still so much more to achieve, so keeping a positive mindset has been extremely important.
Over the last couple of months, I've had the biggest reality check with regards to friends. The ones I thought had my back, were nowhere to be seen, but it's not a bad thing, because as we get older in age, its not about the quantity of acquaintances we have, it's about the quality of friendships. I am fortunate to have had many of my friends who've had my back, supporting me, comforting me, when I've felt the urge to give up.
Life is too short to constantly feel broken from everything little thing that goes wrong. Life will always have its up's and downs, but through every obstacle we face, we become stronger and wiser for each trouble we pass.
I have had to accept that I am not a robot, nor am I a superwoman. I'm only human. A human with feelings, weaknesses and a breaking point. I can't take on everything that happens around me, as much as I would love to, and I cannot be there for everyone, including the ones who are never there for me.
My main problem is that I am always putting others first before myself and that includes, trying to being everyone's saviour. It's in my blood to help anyone in need of support and I guess being empathetic doesn't help.
Yes, it's good to have compassion for others, but not when you're absorbing everyone else's energy and problems. I tend to sense and feel emotions as if they're part of my own experience. In other words, someone else's pain and happiness becomes my pain and happiness. I have to learn to pull away when my energy is being sucked out of me. I have to learn to say no to attending to everyone else's needs, but most importantly, I have to invest more time in loving me, because if I don't, no one else will.
In the last month I have taken the time to enjoy doing the things I love. I have started writing again, enjoyed lunch dates with my friends, participated in home workouts, created videos, spent time at the gym, engaged in nature walks which has involved a bit of photography, gone to well-being events, visited some roof top bars with beautiful sceneries, enjoyed nights out with the girls, changed my diet, and given myself time out from motherhood. I love being a mum, but when the role is constant without a break, you become deflated, and what use will I be to my son, if I have nothing left in me to take care of him?
I have to say that since I have been living my life again, having fun, embracing experiences with family and friends, my life has been much better. I refuse to entertain any negative vibes, or take on any unnecessary drama. I also love my time out moments, where I can reflect, meditate and find my peace.
When you're living life, you don't have time to focus on the rough times, or take on the people who don't bring any joy into your life.
I've stopped worrying about what people will say to me, or about me because it's not my concern. I'm used to people always having an opinion, or judging the things that I do, and to be honest, I no longer care.
I will not apologise for being me, and I will not change who I am to conform to peoples expectations. People love to be critical of anyone that does a particular thing, often out of envy that they aren’t the one who is able to do something. Many a time I have found that people just hate, because they want something to hate on, or they are miserable in their own life and are looking to find fault elsewhere to avoid dealing with their own negative feelings. That's on them, not me.
So, for the remainder of this year, I have vowed to embrace in even more experiences, perhaps a holiday, or a new goal on my bucket list and live.
God/the universe is on my side and no weapon formed against me shall prosper.
What do you plan to do to make yourself happy?